The wellness industry has conveniently created a problem that it is selling the solution to, and so many of us are stuck in its cycle of heal and regulate. And it is making us fragile humans.

In today's episode, we are going to look at regulation as access to choice. We are going to look at how do the work has actually become a way for us to avoid doing the work. Why this has happened, and what to do instead. I am gonna be sharing with you a audio that I share with my one-on-one clients when they come through and they work with me for an extended period of time.

They get access to unique trainings, and this is a part of that training. But first I wanna share a couple of excerpts from something that I recently wrote and sent out, sent out to my email. Um, list humans on my email list. Don't like saying email list. Uh, and also shared on. Substack, I won't read all of it because you can go read it yourself, but here are some important parts.

So at some point, psychology and self-help culture started making a very compelling argument. The reason that people struggle isn't because of their circumstances. It's unexamined in a patterns. If you heal the inside, you fix the outside. There is some truth to this. This does make sense. But then this kept going until doing the work became.

Almost exclusively internal excavation. Your childhood wounds, your attachment cycle style, your nervous system, your limiting beliefs, and the outward part. The building and the contributing and the showing up in the world got deprioritized. And I think for certain specific amounts of people, this became comfortable.

You could spend years in deep, sincere self focus and call it growth. You could feel busy. You could feel brave. But you would end up and many people have and continue to. And if you are in this. Welcome. You are not in the wrong place. You haven't failed. You're not doing anything wrong. It's just maybe your time to come out of that and integrate your learnings and move out into the world.

And if that is you, then I'm here and I'm here to support you. You can do that through one-on-one work, reaching out to me, continuing to listen to the podcast. Although I will say just listen to the podcast is not necessarily going out and doing the work. So if you listen to more than a couple episodes, I'm so happy to hear.

You're here and do consider reaching out to me so that we can integrate some of the learnings that you've had anyway. This self-examination loop doesn't just fail to help. I believe it actually makes things worse because the things that make humans actually feel okay are not found inside of your own head.

Belonging, being needed, making something, contributing to community, feeling competent at something real. These are what the body and mind are literally wired to need. And if you don't have them, you can't think your way into feeling them. You can only get them by going outward. And yes, there is amount of inner work that makes it more possible when you go outward.

And two things are true. We need both. But just know that there is a cycle here. If we don't step out, that cycle for so many people becomes, I feel bad. I examine myself, I isolate myself, I stay inside myself. I feel worse, I examine more and we end up. The exact pain that outward contribution could have solved, not therapy.

And I say this selling services that are self atory, but I'm here to help you go and enjoy your life. Not remain stuck on a hamster wheel of healing, building something showing up somewhere and useful. And when everything is filtered through, how does this land for me and how do I feel safe to do this?

And what is this bringing up this self you? We become the center of gravity for our own decisions, which is super empowering sometimes, but also means that the world outside of us, the concrete world with real problems that we need to save and and solve, and real people to help and real things to build, it starts to feel secondary or optional, something that we do later.

So I'm inviting you as I share with this next audio to consider what if regulation wasn't feeling better or doing the work constantly until I do. But what if it was showing up and choosing how I show up and choosing to be external and choosing to build and contribute outside of myself even when I don't feel great?

What if it was actually having access to. Choice Now, the irony is that I sell a course called Work doesn't have to cost all your energy, and I stand behind every word of it. Sustainable effort is real, and burnout is real. And the grind culture tells you that your worth is, your output is really harmful.

I want you to engage with my services after you've been working, after you've been building something, when you are running on empty and you have forgotten that showing up consistently doesn't mean to destroy yourself. I don't want you to do it if it feels like you're doing something. To avoid not doing anything or doing something, you guys get me.

And if you find yourself really stuck in this loop and you just, you know you wanna go out and enjoy your world, consider one-on-one coaching. Go ahead and book your curiosity. Call link is down below. I truly believe that we have over complicated most of this, and I'm excited to be a part of a community that is no longer going to stand for that.

So thank you for being here. 📍 📍 📍