Beyond fluffy “become magnetic” advice, here you learn exactly HOW to do so.
By the end of this 15 minute episode you will know:
The nervous system science your primal body experiences that creates or destroys magnetism
The truth about if you *need* deep shame healing
The reality beyond shame healing
Next steps:
Listen to 76: Shame Is The Greatest Trap Of Easeful Entrepreneurship – Nervous System and Trauma Healing for Profitable Business
Start with 76 where You’re going to walk away from this episode clear on
The physical manifestation of shame you must know to bring more energy into your body, clarity to mind and profit to business
The little known way shame impacts your day to day actions in business, and how it’s related to all our not-so-helpful habits such as procrastination
How to know if it’s worth your time and energy to focus on shame healing this year
TRANSCRIPT:
[00:00:00] People talk a lot about magnetizing clients and magnetizing money. This is the nervous system science behind how to do that.
[00:00:08] By the end of today’s episode, you are going to walk away knowing exactly how shame repels your dream clients, the nervous system science that your body experiences that creates magnetism so that you can magnetize clients to you.
[00:00:38] And whether or not it’s enough to deal with shame in the present moment with mindset or with different sabbatic tools, or if you need to do something a little bit deeper. Guys, welcome to class. As you guys know, I am preparing for a shameless sales and unapologetic offer creation. Shameless sales is the group program.
[00:00:56] Unapologetic offer creation is the three day live event that is going to be
[00:01:00] free. And. What we’re doing is we’re doing kind of these like mini classes to prepare you, so that you’re going to get the most out of the free event and then the group program, if you choose to join us, welcome to class, this episode is based off of a question that I got inside of Instagram DMs and it, I’m just going to, I’m going to read it.
[00:01:24] Hey Sheridan, I noticed that I have some great in the moment tools for shame. Is this enough or could there be something better? . question came as a response to an Instagram story that I did where we were talking about how shame is what is. Making people kind of avoid you or it’s repelling your clients and you can feel this energy. You guys have seen it, right? You felt it before when it feels like something is kind of off with that person.
[00:01:53] So let’s get back to basics and let’s have a look at, at shame. There is something that happens in society [00:02:00] where we are shamed, right? And we call this toxic shame. Humans will dose out this toxic shame through their words and through their actions. And just like everything that our bodies receive as stimuli. We’re going to bring that in and we’re actually going to store that into ourselves until we begin to digest that and release what is not serving and supporting for ourselves.
[00:02:25] So this shame kind of comes into our experience and it comes into ourselves. It manifests in our biology and it actually gives us this feeling that we are bad meat. So it’s kind of like, you’re naughty, you’re bad, you’re a bad girl, you’re a bad boy. You start internalizing that and you store in your soma, in your soma being your body, this feeling of being bad meat.
[00:02:53] This means that we grow up thinking that we are We’re gross, we’re disgusting, we’re worthless, um, we’re, [00:03:00] we’re, we’re kind of like different to other people. There’s something wrong with us. Um, we’re some level of distasteful, some level of bad, not worthy, uh, not deserving of good stuff. We literally have this wiring inside of our system that tells us that we are rotten.
[00:03:17] Sometimes you can actually, we actually hear this word, right? Like you’re so, you’re spoiled rotten or you’re a rotten child, right? And so we have, with time, this buildup of shame that seeps into the entire cellular physiology. It comes into our movements, it comes into our postures, it comes into our muscles, our meat, and we believe, feel, and express that we are this like rotten, bad, undeserving ball of shame.
[00:03:47] Right. In episode 76, we do go into Some of the manifestations of this, particularly as it becomes, as it comes to your business. And so you would be able to go back to that [00:04:00] episode. I’ll link it down below and you’ll be able to know, okay. Uh, if I’m doing these things or if I’m experiencing these things, it might be a shame.
[00:04:07] It might be a sign that shame is manifest inside of my body. And I could benefit from. Digesting it, removing it. So shame, I like to think of as like this moldy chicken. We will literally do anything to avoid it. It’s like dirty meat. We like, nobody wants to be around moldy chicken. good question Freya Thank you as you guys know Freya is my beautiful co host who is definitely an AI robo But she is building her business alongside of you guys and asking questions that you are thinking.
[00:04:43] Good question. Okay. The nervous system science behind magnetic offers has to do with shame because your body has something, your body, my body, everyone’s body. We all have something called neuroception. This is a term that was coined by Steven Porges. He
[00:05:00] is really not the founder of polyvagal theory, unless it actually is.
[00:05:03] The founder of polyvagal theory, the theory of itself, but polyvagal theory, right? And Stephen Porteous talks about how our nervous system takes in information about the environment it is in, as well as what’s happening in our body to tell us how safe it is and therefore what type of nervous system state it needs to be in.
[00:05:23] Therefore, what type of thoughts to give you, what types of impulses to give you, what types of motions to give you, um, what types of gut feelings to give you, what to do with your digestion, what to do with your muscles, what to do with your breathing, your heart rate and all of your organ based activities.
[00:05:43] Using neuroception, we feel into the nervous system of every single being that is around us and we get a sense of, okay, what are they experiencing about the world and what does that mean [00:06:00] for me? Now, we already know that a nervous system that is experiencing shame is manifesting as rotten meat. It believes it’s rotten meat.
[00:06:13] It believes it’s like moldy chicken. And it’s acting as if it were moldy chicken. We also know you will do anything to avoid stinky moldy chicken. So, what do we end up doing? We end up avoiding people who are holding a lot of shame. Now, yes, there is nuance here. Sometimes we’re attracted to them because we’re working out our own shadows and, like, all that stuff.
[00:06:42] But especially in sales. Sales is sales is an exchange of confidence and clarity and congruence. So We don’t want somebody who is. tainted with shame. Why would I want to purchase something from somebody who’s tainted with shame? My nervous system is going to avoid that
[00:07:00] person and you’ll notice how the more confident people are, the more magnetic they become, how the more authentic they are, the more magnetic they become.
[00:07:07] This is why we have this obsession with authenticity because it is the anti of shame. It’s, it’s the ultra, is that not the alter ego? It’s the opposite of shame. So what we really need to do is we need to, uh, Address shame and digest it through the system, release it from the system. If you want to magnetize clients and profit towards yourself or anything in life, really.
[00:07:37] So coming back to the original question, which was, I noticed that I have some great tools for shame in the moment. And so she’s probably referring to like Um, tools that you’re feeling shame and then you do a 20 minute breathwork practice and like now, now you’re no longer feeling it or maybe you journal about it or something, right?
[00:07:56] Is this enough or could there be something better? There is something
[00:08:00] better and you are about to experience that you’re in the right place when you join Unapologetic Offer Creation and Shameless Sales, you’re going to experience that something better because. What we’re going to do inside of those containers and what I’m encouraging you to do, even if you don’t join the container is to actually begin releasing the shame from the primal body until we release it from the primal body, it’s still going to be there.
[00:08:30] So yes, you release it in the moment, maybe you become more magnetic for 20 minutes, but the overall. Story that other people are hearing, feeling, perceiving with neuroception from you is one of shame, which means that they are going to be averse to engaging with you in the same way. Does it mean that nobody engages with you ever?
[00:08:54] Absolutely not. We’re not going to go with two extremes with this guys. It means
[00:09:00] that. The level of engagement and magnetism and attraction that you could be generating is going to be far superior to what, what, sorry, the level of attraction and magnetism and income and, um. Experiences that your magnetism magnetizing to you when you have a primal body that is drenched in shame, it is what you experience is going to be far superior to what you’re going to experience when you heal.
[00:09:35] Your shame body when you purge through or digest through the shame that has been pulled into your into your body, because when you begin to heal that toxic shame in your body, people are no longer going to be perceiving it quite as much with neuroception. And that’s going to affect you. And then in
[00:10:00] different ways, some of the ways that I have seen this effect, both myself and my clients over the years are, I’m going to tell you them, I think that the biggest one, especially for entrepreneurs and service providers.
[00:10:15] Is that you end sales calls or you end pitchers with this warmth in your body and a smile on your face and a lightness, you know, it’s like that time that I, yeah, I think of myself often and you’re like ready to voice message your best friend. Cause it went so well. Like that time that I fell over on my tennis shoes because of it.
[00:10:36] Yeah. Like you have this energy of like, that went so well, even if the person doesn’t sign up or anything just, Oh, that went so well. Ah, healing your shame body. And then applying that to business means that you increase the clarity and confidence and quality of your marketing and quantity of your marketing without having to experience more stress or overwhelm.
[00:10:59] It [00:11:00] means that you wake up to an inbox full of like invoice paid emails and that your bank account is steadily growing. Yesterday I was sitting with my roommate and I got an email and it was a pay of two payments for two amounts of money that I didn’t recognize. I was like, what? When did I, what? When did I get that?
[00:11:19] Why am I getting money? And I was like, Oh yeah, I forgot that I had, I had, you know, I signed these two clients on these bespoke passive packages. So that was cool. So those moments, right? It’s sales that no longer feel salesy, pushy or icky that even those words have left your vocabulary. It sells the. Like in this example, you know, I’m like, okay, we made a bespoke package.
[00:11:42] That was the correct thing. It didn’t feel salesy. It felt like a collaboration. It felt like a casual conversation. I walked away from that sales call feeling really amazing. Totally forgot about it. Received the payment a few days later. Cool. Amazing. There’s this deep breath about that. There’s this lightness, there’s a deep confidence
[00:12:00] and you become this walking inspiration, this permission slip to make life easy, happy, light, full of love.
[00:12:09] You’re no longer ashamed of things being too easy for yourself or things going too well. You love sharing what you know and you do it with clean energy that they’re inspired to be happy even when their life is rough. You You, you love, you know, waking up before your alarm. Those little things. You like, you get to spend more time looking at the plants around you.
[00:12:34] And this is a really big one about money. You get to be money neutral, which means that money means nothing about you, your worth, anything you’ve done or anything you need to prove or do to anything or anyone money covers your bills. It covers your desires. You feel confident receiving it. You feel confident holding it for longer periods of time so that you can reach your saving goals, your investment goals, and you also feel comfortable spending it without guilt.
[00:12:59] You see that money
[00:13:00] supports you and supports others. And when you look at your bank account, you do not experience tension in your body. This is what we do when we heal shame. And then we apply it to entrepreneurship. We apply it to business. Your job right now is to start. Really feeling in to these podcast episodes that I’m releasing this little mini classes.
[00:13:22] And so if you haven’t already, I really want to encourage you to go back to episode number 76 called shame is the greatest trap of easeful entrepreneurship. You are going to walk away from that episode really clear on the physical manifestations of shame in your body. Um, that you’d like to know about so that you can bring in more energy so that you can have more clarity so that you can have more profit.
[00:13:46] You’re also going to. You’re going to know the little known way that shame impacts your day to day actions in business and how it is related to not so helpful habits such as procrastination and how to know if it’s your Worth your time and [00:14:00] energy to focus on a shame healing this year. Enjoy that podcast