Why Smart People Need To Stop Looking For The Answers To Make Consistent $5k Months – Learn How Alyssa Used Trauma Healing and Nervous System Regulation to Create A Profitable Business inside Body Based Business 

Today’s podcast is going to support you in:

– identifying where your inner good girl might be sabotaging your success

– how to move through frustration after you’ve invested a lot and you feel like your business should be further along

– what to do when you feel frustrated by your coach

– how to overcome the fear of criticism, judgment, judgment, and fear of persecution using the wisdom of your body

– what to do if you’re considering getting supported in your business, but you’re moving through a personal crisis, and business isn’t your main focus. 

You, just like Alyssa can learn to find the answers within you own body so that you inner good girl allows you to have success, you over come fear of judgement and create a coaching relationship full of trust – with me – inside of Body Based Business by first booking your Embodied Sales Call. 

Inside this 30 minute call, we’ll craft your $5k Body Based Blueprint and determine whether Body Based Business is your next best investment to create a 2024 that’s more regulated and more profitable. 

TRANSCRIPT:

[00:00:00] Sheridan: Have you ever just wanted somebody to tell you that you were doing it right and this is going to be the way that you get everything that you want? I certainly have. And Alyssa, our guest, has as well. Today’s podcast is going to support you in identifying where your inner good girl might be kind of sabotaging your success, how to move through frustration after you’ve invested a lot and you feel like your business should be further along on feeling frustrated by your coach on fear of criticism, judgment, judgment, and fear of persecution, how to use your body to overcome that.

[00:00:50] What to do when you’re considering getting supported in your business, but you’re moving through a personal crisis and business perhaps isn’t your main focus. .

[00:01:00] I originally met her when I learnt and I was curious. She was a nurse. She was also a former Catholic nun and now she works as a financial, spiritual and emotional mentor supporting people in the.

[00:01:13] process and methodology, divine feminine finance. She empowers heart centered business owners to transform their relationship with money through self love, divine connection and financial education.

[00:01:24] She spends her day supporting people in connecting to an inner source of love and abundance so that they can have more money. This is, it’s very different to how she used to spend them before we started working together.

[00:01:38] was oscillating between hope and despair, excitement and frustration, um, basically the [00:02:00] rollercoaster of entrepreneurial, however you say that word, um, yeah, so I, a bit of a rollercoaster in terms of like impatience, fear of visibility, self doubt, perfectionism.

[00:02:18] Confusion. Lack of clarity about my niche. Must I go on? And so, those are all very real aspects of what I was current, at that time, currently experiencing. And it was, um, I mean, I, I, if I, like, looking back on it, I would say it’s par for the course. Like, it’s part of what, the stage I was in, on one hand. And, um, Yeah, but then it was like part of it in my case, which I, I feel is true for a lot of people who, who are starting their own business or

[00:03:00] have started their own business and then they feel like they haven’t quite found the niche that they want or the etc.

[00:03:06] And so for me, I had all these years of experience and education and wisdom and expertise, but I didn’t know how to bring it all together into a cohesive focus. Which at the moment of recording this, I feel like I’m calling it multi modality madness. And so is a way of like summarizing it. Um, and so I had this unique kind of background and I was trying to figure out a way to make it into a business and to focus it.

[00:03:38] Um, and. just for context, if you don’t mind, I’d love to briefly share about that. So, okay. So like I was a nurse initially, um, that was my original like post high school training was, um, a nursing education. So in the U S it’s called the bachelor of science and nursing. [00:04:00] And after I did that for a bit, then I decided to become a nun.

[00:04:04] And so I was a Catholic nun for 13 years. And in that I devoted myself to a mystical path. Contemplative, semi monastic fusion of silence and directing retreats and teaching people how to be mystics, basically. And I studied theology, and I went on Tibetan Buddhist retreats in Nepal, and like, all kinds, all kinds of things.

[00:04:26] And then I decided, I woke up one day and realized, I didn’t want to be a nun anymore. And so, for various reasons. Um, and when I left, I realized, what am I going to do now? So I, I’m obviously fast forwarding that story. Um, but what happened is that in that process of like asking myself this question of my original question at that moment was, how do I find a job that integrates all my knowledge and experience and passions and gifts and

[00:05:00] all of that?

[00:05:00] And, and then when I asked that question, I realized inside of me, the answer was that job doesn’t exist. I have to create it. And in that moment I decided to start my own business, even though I had no idea what that meant. Like I had, I literally had no clue. Um, and so when I met, when I met Cher, when I met you, I started, I was at this place where I had been, um, learning a lot.

[00:05:29] I’d been taking tons of courses. I’d had several different mentors, some coaches and things like that in different kind of containers. And systems. And I was trying to find the external, like I was looking for the answer in external authority. Is ultimately what was happening. And I went, because I have a long sphere, yeah.[00:06:00]

[00:06:20] Yes.

[00:06:41] Yes. Really good question. Um, so if I could describe that, um, It’s really[00:07:00]

[00:07:00] part of working with you, what, what it helped me identify was this, and in the sense that I realized that I, like that inner self or that part or whichever framework, you know, there’s different frameworks that have, you use to support people and have supported me as well as other complimentary frameworks I had used in the past.

[00:07:21] And it kind of came together when you. Um, you were helping me to like peace out what was going on, um, in different levels. And so on one level I would say before I met you, what was happening that I later identified was that I, it’s like my inner good girl that you talk about, um, occasionally and that I had known before, but the way that you integrate it with business is really helpful.

[00:07:50] And my inner good girl that. only knows how to function based on external cues. So external direction, affirmation, validation, [00:08:00] and extrinsic motivation. It, she was just screaming, will someone just tell me what to do? Like somebody just tell me what to do because that was the only way that she, that’s the way that she had learned how to orient herself in life like that.

[00:08:14] The way I look at it now is that inner good girl was my, Like on one hand from the emotional, the emotional like level and on the nervous system level, it was a survival, it was a survival skill. Like it was a coping mechanism and survival skill to be like, I just want to be safe. I just want to do the right thing in, in whatever way that meant that I would be successful.

[00:08:38] Like in a way it was a way of measuring success, but that way in the moment I decided to start my own business was a recipe for failure. And that was a total disconnect inside of me that was a constant clash, like in my nervous system, in my everything. And it was like, I realized that the entire framework that [00:09:00] I had used to navigate my life, my, my education, my success, being a straight A student and all the like other ways of measuring success.

[00:09:11] It was a disaster. Like it was a failure. And that it like flipped it, that success framework on, on its head. And so I was, the frustration that came in was, I mean, you could say it was part of the, the process of relearning and healing that kind of on a level trauma. If you want to put it, you know, depending on how you look at it.

[00:09:37] Um, where I, I realized like, oh wow, the entire compass that I’ve used to navigate. Success and achievement, it doesn’t work here, like if in my business, like it literally doesn’t work and it, it was like a stumbling block every single time I wanted to post something or, or get clarity on my niche or et cetera, X, Y, Z, [00:10:00] continue that.

[00:10:39] No, no, that’s, I, yeah. Um, I, so to describe like, The transition in, from like when, when I met you and when we started working together. Just to mention a couple more things about that because it, it is helpful I think for people to [00:11:00] understand and to connect.

[00:11:08] Yes, totally, yeah absolutely. Um, so in that, at that point when I, like going back to describing. Um, just specifically for me, what I was quote unquote, niching between or pivoting back and forth and trying to find, navigate that aspect of business at that stage was, um, I started focusing on inner wisdom, life purpose, self love, divine connection, and financial education empowerment.

[00:11:42] And so I was, I had clients, it felt a little bit all over the place and I had clients in all of these areas. Um, I was doing it all by word of mouth and I wasn’t like marketing it yet because I was just, um, exploring where I could find the most

[00:12:00] alignment, like both for myself and, and with others. And so that was like, inside of me, I knew I was like, there, I really want to bring all of this together, but I just don’t know how.

[00:12:13] And, and it, it felt, that’s why I say frustration. Cause when I met you, it was like, I. There was a bit of frustration already at that point because I was like, I, this is taking too long. This is just taking too long and I think, I think a lot of people can relate to that when you’re building a business. It just feels like it’s taking forever, especially if, depending on where you’re at, like if you’ve decided to go all in on your business or if you still have a part time job or full time job, like depending on all those decisions, you know, that like that you’re making in the process as an entrepreneur and, and so.

[00:12:48] For me, I, I was at the stage where I really wanted to go, quote unquote, go all in and just, like, focus on my business so I could build it. But because I didn’t have that clarity about my niche, that was, it was still a big

[00:13:00] frustration. It felt really slow. So, when I, like, this answers a couple other questions, but, like, I had had multiple mentors and coaches and programs like I mentioned earlier.

[00:13:16] And I’d invested a lot already in support and, and on one hand, I recognize that that like what going back to what you were asking before about how do you navigate between when I’m looking for external advice and support and when I’m like wanting an external authority to give me like I’m removing my authority to someone outside of me.

[00:13:38] And that was part of the learning process for me. That working with you helped me to begin to feel into a little bit more Because on one hand although everything I do feel that I’ve done and taken as a business Or owner so far. They’ve all had their value like

[00:14:00] they’ve all had their place But it often was a more of a masculine approach, which we need, I need that in business, especially because I tend to have a lot of more feminine aspects.

[00:14:11] And so I did need the masculine principle kind of structure and foundation. Like that’s one aspect of what I was looking for outside of me, so to speak. Um, but I also needed to build that inside of me, you know, and, and so those were some other, those are some other layers to it. And I couldn’t, like, it was very, Um, because I still couldn’t piece through that and that this is like a daily navigation.

[00:14:35] This is not like I have figured that out, but I must, yeah,

[00:14:44] yeah, exactly, exactly. But when, because of that in inner clarity that I was really like angst, like I felt this angst of wanting to find that inner clarity, like that inner alignment of like, this is it. And the 

[00:15:00] way I would describe it when I was like, I was like preparing to meet with you and have this podcast and it was really like the frustration of that inner good girl saying like, well, someone just tell me what to do.

[00:15:11] Um, and sometimes when Cher and I would meet, I don’t know if I’ve ever told it to you like this Cher, but I would get so frustrated. She would make me even more frustrated because she would be like, wait a minute. No. Okay, well, how about, what if you just, and I would be like, Can you just help me, like, write this post for Facebook?

[00:15:29] Like, I need to create my lead magnet. And she would be like, Okay, let’s back up. Like, how does it feel in your body? And I’m like, You know what? Like, I don’t even care! Just You know, like, fuck you!

[00:15:53] Yeah, exactly. Yeah, it was, there were definitely those moments

[00:16:00] and so, but the, if I could encapsulate that in a funny way, I was, when I was reflecting on this, I was like on, on the niche side of things, like, and looking for an answer and clarity and all that, I felt like I was on a wild goose chase in many moments that I just couldn’t put a name to the wild goose.

[00:16:20] Like, what the hell do I call this wild goose? If only I knew her name, I could call out to her in the darkness, and maybe she would hear me calling and come to me. And I, but it was like, I don’t know who she is. I don’t know what to call her, but I know she exists. And so it felt like this, like, unicorn, you know, niche or business or something.

[00:16:39] And,

[00:16:50] yeah. Yes. Yeah, exactly. And, um, And then one day, I remember, I was

[00:17:00] in a session with Cher, and we’d been working together for, I’m fast forwarding because now we’ve been working together for a while, um, but there was this moment where I, I had been telling her, like, when I was, I’m like, I’m talking to you and I’m talking to your audience, like you and her, and, okay,

[00:17:24] I love it. Okay, good. So you’re, you’re tracking, um, you can navigate between you and her. Um,

[00:17:35] cool. So I remember cause I’d been, I’ve been sharing with Cher multiple times about like, okay, I’m, you know, I’m working, I’m focusing on self love with this client. I’m working on inner wisdom and divine connection. And then with this client, I’m focusing on like financial empowerment and tools. to help them build a strong foundation, etc.

[00:17:56] And, in one of the sessions, support sessions [00:18:00] we had, there was this moment where she, I can’t remember, I don’t know if you remember what you asked me, but I think you asked me something like, how would you describe what you do? I,

[00:18:14] I was trying to remember exactly how, but anyways, it’s not important, it’s something around that. And, and I remember I said something like, I don’t know, it’s, I guess it’s kind of like I’m, I’m a divine feminine finance guide. And I just like blurted it out. And I was like, what was that? And your eyes just like popped open like, oh my god, like that’s it.

[00:18:43] And I was like, and you said something like, that’s it. And I was like, Part of me was like, yeah, that’s it. I found the wild goose. The unicorn has landed. But then, I immediately began to dismiss it. And I was like, no, no, no, no. What the heck is that? No, it’s not that. It’s like, I need the

[00:19:00] masculine too. I love the masculine.

[00:19:01] It’s not just the feminine. And you were like, stop. Stop. And she said to me, she was like, Can you just like back up and take a second and Like, feel into what you just said, and don’t let your mind, because it feels to me like your mind is then just, like, trying to dismiss it or something like that.

[00:19:50] Yep, back to survival mode, yeah, totally, absolutely, a thousand percent, and even like connecting that,

[00:20:00] what you just said with what we were saying before, even like the inner good girl and the survival mechanisms and the way that you talk about You know, the nervous system, um, like sabotaging our expansion and growth and that, that’s one specific kind of moment where, and there’s many, you know, as you say, but that was a big one that was like massive.

[00:20:24] And um, that was a moment where I remember it was like, okay. If I think about it now, and I can say this for people who either are currently receiving mentorship from you or are considering it or whatever, is if I hadn’t had Cher in that moment to question me and to stop me and to be like, hold your horses, like that, don’t just let your mind go off again and dismiss, you know, this, this like birthing of this

[00:21:00] new, um, what do you call it?

[00:21:02] Like, uh, A new paradigm for me, the way I call it is it’s part of a new paradigm of business where we are birthing something new. And I’m not the only one I’m birthing something new in my own way. But so many, I believe people who come to your work are people who they’re literally birthing something that has not been done before.

[00:21:23] And that’s why it’s so hard sometimes to navigate because you’re like, how do I do this? Like, I don’t have a framework that can, that works anymore. And so, I mean, I can just keep answering the questions like,[00:22:00]

[00:22:40] yeah, yeah, that’s a really, really good question. I can just say that from the time, like I am not the same person in my business anymore. Like I, if I could just say in the last two months, like I, I went from. Being 

[00:23:00] paralyzed essentially in my fear of visibility, my fear of like the perfectionism around things of like, uh, the voice that’s trying to please people, fear of criticism and persecution, all of that to now, like from that moment I described of find finding, quote unquote the clarity around my niche, um, which was ultimately a fusion of mysticism and spirituality.

[00:23:25] Self-love. Emotional work and nervous system, as well as financial empowerment. That’s my niche. My niche is divine feminine finance. And once I made once after a lot, a while of working with you found that from that moment on, I, Oh, well then I had a major life challenge that came up out of the blue, um, delayed things a little bit more, but.

[00:23:52] I had, still had your support during that time, which actually saved me in many ways. And then once I got through that a

[00:24:00] little bit, I ran my, I created and I sold and created an, a six week program. I, I managed to do that when I was going through like one of the most difficult moments of my life. And then I.

[00:24:23] Set up my first landing page. I started my email list for the first time. I learned the tech, which was always really, like, challenging. And I hadn’t wanted to make the financial commitment or merit to marry a platform until I was, like, ready to do so. And all of those, like, technical, structural things. Now I just ran my first free event, Immersion and Retreat, last week on Facebook.

[00:24:49] I’m posting more. I’m posting more. You know, all of the things that were like, I don’t know, I don’t know how to do, like, what should I do, like, all of the things, and it’s not perfect, but that’s the point, like, 

[00:25:00] the perfectionism is no longer keeping me from, from just, um, taking action and, and birthing this thing that is, I know it’s for, it’s for the good of humanity, like, it’s not, this is, it’s not about, it’s not just about me, like, it really is, It’s a massive contribution, um, for people to be empowered in this way.

[00:25:26] So yeah,

[00:26:00] [00:27:00]

[00:27:27] yeah. Um,

[00:27:33] first I would say probably something similar to what you would say because I teach people this too. First listen to your body. And that is like the first. Because all of the external things are always going to be really challenging. Um, And, if your body says yes, then

[00:28:00] move forward with it. And if you can’t find the answer, or it feels like it’s not clear, you keep doubting, then sign up.

[00:28:08] Because, because that’s what she can help you with. Like, literally. And if,

[00:28:21] Yeah, and if it’s no then it’s no obviously like but you wouldn’t really be here like if it was a total no You know, it’s just like you have to see what the timing is and all of that and it’s all of that is valid of course, but honestly, it’s the inner like the It’s Because part of the way that you approach this share is that it’s not it is about your business But obviously because it’s based on Body wisdom and embodiment and all of that.

[00:28:50] It applies to every area of life. And, and so, even if Someone is going through something really

[00:29:00] challenging. It’s one of the best ways to stay connected with their business and not completely, I don’t even have the word for how I have felt at moments where I’m like, I can’t, like, I can’t do this. I can’t do this.

[00:29:14] It’s too much. Yeah. I’m overwhelmed. Like a total overwhelmed. Like I can’t even keep it together to work on my business right now. Like if you’re experiencing that. Um, then this is one of the best kinds of support as a business owner is what I would say because there’s so many kinds of support out there in terms of coaching and business.

[00:29:38] But the best one for me when it comes to moments of crisis in life, not only business is having the embodied, um, integration and the nervous system application. Within it, uh, because we do like, especially when we’re going through a hard time. It’s a literally

[00:30:00] freak. It’s freak out time. Like it’s freak out.

[00:30:01] And so all, everything comes up and it can just be, yeah, it can be panic. There’s, yeah, there’s a lot that happens. Yeah.[00:31:00]

[00:31:12] So for me, when I, I can’t remember if I mentioned this before. Um, Um, like today on the call with you, I have, but, um, because I, I am a nurse, I studied the nervous system and so in depth, like physiology and all of that and worked with the nervous system. Right. Um, but I studied the old model, the, what I would call the old model.

[00:31:40] There’s two parts of the nervous system. There’s the sympathetic fight or flight. Freeze, fun, et cetera. And there’s the parasympathetic rest and digest. So you’re either running from a tiger or you’re sleeping in your bed at night. And there’s, what happens in between? Like what the hell happens in between?

[00:31:57] And that’s where the polyvagal theory comes in.

[00:32:00] So interestingly enough, I had, I had not long before I met you, I had actually not read but listened polyvagal theory. Um. Um. And, well, I mean, there’s now obviously many books on polyvagal theory, but I had listened to the, um, Stephen Porges. What’s his name?

[00:32:20] Oh, so bad. Porges, right? Okay, you can correct this and edit. Stephen Porges, yeah. The father, if you want to say, or whatever. Um, yes, that’s the one I’m referring to. Yeah, it’s a little bit dry. It’s very clinic it’s kind of It’s clinical. It’s a clinical approach. It’s a little dry. But. Okay. Yes. Yeah. So I had read that not long before I met you.

[00:32:57] So then when I met you and we talked about this,

[00:33:00] um, and I, I really loved that you integrated this. And I thought, okay, I’ve been taking lots of business programs. Nobody out there has talked about the polyvagal theory in business. And, and so for me it was like, Oh yeah, this is amazing. Right. This is like so cool.

[00:33:17] Um, and, and so that, that was like a personal, right. Interesting connection. And then after working with you and then working with my clients, I knew I wanted to integrate some aspect of the physical, like physiology and the nervous system because I know how important that is. Um, but I didn’t know how I was going to integrate it necessarily because I was literally doing like.

[00:33:39] Deep Inner Sanctuary Womb Work, Divine Feminine, Divine Masculine, and Financial Empowerment, you know. And so when I ended up finding that integration between these different areas into Divine Feminine Finance, it fit right in because I could support people with the awareness around their nervous system and their relationship with money.

[00:33:59] So [00:34:00] now I’m applying it in a specific area and way. Where, I mean, I don’t do it exactly like you do, but we do it very complimentary, Complimentarily, Um, Into, This, this way of really Helping to Have awareness around That Beautiful Bridge Between running from a tiger And like, being a zombie Hehehe Like, and, and to find like the, the pleasure and the joy and the ease and the nourishment and all of that in their relationship with money.[00:35:00]

[00:35:25] So I have created a program called birth a new relationship with money and that is a six week program. So I offer that if people want to have like build a foundation, but they don’t want to do something super long. That’s one option. I also do one on one work to go much deeper with people and really personalize and customize their bridge, the, how to bridge between spirituality and their relationship with money and building a strong financial foundation.

[00:35:59] You can [00:36:00] find me on Facebook. I have a Facebook group called Ember Divine Feminine Finance at the moment , I am focusing primarily on women, , in my community. If you are a man and you hear any of what we said today and you feel like I actually want to know more about that for myself.

[00:36:18] I’m happy to have a conversation with you and see how I can support you as well with this.

[00:36:33] My dear listener, you just like Alyssa can learn to find the answers within your own body so that your inner good girl allows you to have success and overcome your fear of judgment so that you can create a coaching relationship full of trust so that you can Create simple and sustainable, consistent 5k months that you can scale from inside of body based business.

[00:36:56] When you are working with me, the first step to do so is to 

[00:37:00] book your embodied sales call, where we are going to craft a four step process towards creating those sustainable 5k months. Through your own body based blueprint at the end of that call, we’re going to determine whether or not body based business, body based business is the best next investment to create a year that is more regulated and more profitable.

[00:37:23] You’ll find a link to do so down below.

[00:37:25]

[00:37:28]