Feeling Pressure Without Anxiety – 1 Skill Every Entrepreneur Needs To Master For Profitable, Nervous System Friendly Business 

In this episode you’ll learn:

The difference between an urgent trauma response and an intuitive, intelligent desire

How to balance “I must get things done” with the desirse that expand and stretch you

How to manage end of year/month urgency to reach your goals

Recommended next episodes:

Episode 39-43: How Your Nervous System Affects Your Business – Poly Vagal Theory & Stress Relief Training Part 1 – 4

The episode where I share what separates you from those who seem to have ‘cracked the code’ of business, and you. I discover the information I share here in a moment of ‘divine desperation,’ I started applying my trauma therapy training and nervous system awareness to business.

This knowledge has helped me, and my clients:

Create sustainable income from your business

Build a somatic game plan, a road map, and a structure to support an increase in income, and ease

Spend more time taking naps, eating tacos and laying in the sun.

This episode covers the foundations of:

4 places your nervous system influences your business income and impact

What Poly Vagal theory is – and what everyone’s missing about it

How to start leveraging your nervous system for success – TODAY

TRANSCRIPT:
[00:00:00] So how do you move towards your goals and work with timelines without feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or procrastinating? You’re about to find out in this episode, you’re going to learn the difference between an urgent trauma response and an intuitive, intelligent desire,

[00:00:29] how to balance. I must get things done with desires that expand and stretch you and how to manage the end of year, end of month, end of week, urgency to reach your goals.

[00:00:40] A lot of the time when we experience, uh, pressure to, we have a goal essentially, maybe it’s a goal that we have. kind of given ourselves, like you really want to, I don’t know, let’s just say you really want to make 5, 000 this month, or maybe it’s an [00:01:00] external need, expectation or pressure, such as you have to pay rent or your taxes are due, or your kid has to pay for their childcare, something like that.

[00:01:14] Let’s say it’s something like that.

[00:01:18] Our body responds to that either. Internal desire to make 5k this month or the external container to pay your taxes with sensations. It communicates us to us with sensations or certain functions inside of the body, such as your heart beating faster, your digestion changing different amounts of saliva.

[00:01:44] Those sensations are often translated into emotions and then they are taken into the level of. Thoughts. Right. But essentially what they’re coming from is our body. Our vessel of our body is perceiving [00:02:00] through something that we call neuroception, perceiving and taking in information and translating that up to the brain, which then gets translated back down to the body.

[00:02:08] And we have this kind of symbiosis of communication between the two, which then you and I as humans, we experience and observe. Right? So when we’re dealing with things that need to happen, a lot of the time, the things that need to happen, we perceive them through that perception. We end up experiencing a lot of sensation because Of our relationship with that specific thing, right.

[00:02:43] And that relationship is going to change in so many things. And we’ll go into it a little bit, but we end up like, we see that there’s a goal. There’s this goal that has to happen. There’s this thing that has to be done. The end of the year is happening. My friend said something all of a sudden I need to pay rent, or I forgot that I didn’t organize enough money for my taxes, or I want to buy a new [00:03:00] iPhone.

[00:03:00] And so now I feel this sensation come into my body and. A lot of the time what happens is when that is a lot for the body to hold, to experience, and you haven’t, you haven’t practiced holding that specific experience enough for it to be neutral. It tips our body into a stress response. It tips the nervous system into a stress response because it’s like, Oh, that’s a lot.

[00:03:28] That’s a lot. That’s a, that’s an experience. I, this is new. I don’t know how I feel about that. That’s a lot. And when it tips it into the stress response, we can go a couple of different ways. We can go into a fight response, a flight response, or an immobilization response, which is tends to be either a freeze or a fall response.

[00:03:48] So what does this mean? Actually, let’s say it’s like the end of the year. It’s the beginning of December as I’m, as I’m releasing this or mid December as I’m releasing this. Let’s say that you had a specific income that you wanted to make. Um, and [00:04:00] maybe you haven’t made it. So we, we have that experience.

[00:04:03] I’m noticing that numbers are saying this, and this is what I wanted instead. And we have a sensational experience in the body. What happens if that extent, it’s sensational experience in the body goes beyond what our body is, uh, what our nervous system is capable of experiencing in that specific moment, we might go into a fight response.

[00:04:22] So that often looks like. Self critical you’re being you’re criticizing yourself, uh, or you start criticizing other people or you start getting annoyed like it was, there’s a lot of blame often it happened. It didn’t happen because of this. It didn’t happen because of that. We get really frustrated. Um, we can have a lot of self judgment.

[00:04:43] Uh, we can get really critical towards herself. That’s the one that I tend to go towards. I don’t know if you guys do. Uh, we can really step into the not enoughness. part of things. Um, it can be hard. So we have this like criticism come through, right? This [00:05:00] fight energy, this like knife energy is what I call it.

[00:05:02] And it’s like, I have to do this right now. But like, we, we want to kind of move towards and we get that pushy kind of energy. Like I’m going to go do this. I’m going to start thing. My to do list is this long now I’m going to go and I’m going to get this all done. And yeah. And now it’s not. Bad. It’s just to understand your patterns.

[00:05:18] These patterns can sometimes be very helpful, but we want to understand your pattern. So go into this like, eh, fighty energy either towards yourself or towards other people or towards your goal. You’re like, I’m gonna get this done. And then we enter into hustle and then we into burnout. You do work for 12 hours, 10 days straight, and it can be a lot.

[00:05:38] Okay. Oh, that’s just me. No, I’m kidding. Um. Then we can also have flight response. Notice your tendency. A flight response is going to look more like, Oh, I’m just so overwhelmed that all of a sudden I have so many things to do and I’m really scared and I’m anxious and I’m like flitting between the apps in my phone and I’m [00:06:00] half doing things and now it’s really hard for me to focus on something.

[00:06:04] thing, and this is when I get into shiny object syndrome. So I just like abandon all of the goals that I had. And I think if I just, I’m just going to go invest in this thing and I’m going to buy this thing and I’m going to start new, this new hobby, we feel really overwhelmed. And maybe we start talking to our friends a lot because we want to talk.

[00:06:22] This is a lot of talking energy. And it’s just like, Oh my God, there’s so much, it’s just so much, this flight energy. You can be really busy as well in this flight energy. People are really good at keeping themselves busy in the flight and the fight responses. So you can do that. Your body might also go into one of the immobilization response.

[00:06:46] The phone response might look more like kind of this people pleasing, but it’s, it’s with business people pleasing is super sneaky. So it’s like releasing content that you think [00:07:00] people will want. There’s a lot of control. It’s like if I kind of want to like control this person so that they buy from me or, doing what other.

[00:07:08] People what you think other people want from you. So for some of you, that’s going to actually appear as not making money because you perceive that somebody in your life doesn’t want you to, or they’re like, not going to love you. If you do, , for others of you, it’s going to be working in a specific way because I don’t know, like working all day when it doesn’t actually.

[00:07:27] Um, benefit you because you don’t want your partner to think you’re lazy or something like that. Um, we kind of just fall and we start looking to others for reassurance. We start looking to others to make decisions for us and take the lead. The other response is a freeze response where everything is going to feel really heavy.

[00:07:45] Um, and you avoid things that are actually going to help you. You feel really stuck and often hopeless or embarrassed. You’re probably still often moving through the motions, um, but it just feels really, really heavy and not very good. [00:08:00] Sometimes you’re not going to be moving through emotions and you’re going to be in one of those spaces where you like to kind of stay in bed for a couple of days.

[00:08:07] That also happens to some of us. So what’s happened here is that probably you have a desire. You want a new iPhone. You want to make 5k by the end of the month, or you want your income to look a certain way, or you want to pay rent. You have a desire. That’s the desire that a sensation of desire comes into the body.

[00:08:27] Um, and perhaps sensation of fear comes into the body and perhaps sensation of, I don’t know, maybe shame came into the body because you’re realizing you haven’t. Reach your desire, or you’re afraid that you won’t reach your desire, but you actually have this desire. What we need to learn to do is to hold enough desire in the body and its corresponding emotions.

[00:08:48] So if there’s fear wrapped around, or if there’s shame wrapped around it, or whatever it is, or if there’s hope and excitement wrapped around it, we want to actually learn to hold. Enough emotion and sensation within the body [00:09:00] without dropping into one of these stress, stress responses. And what this involves is radically being where you are now, breathing into it and not letting it change.

[00:09:10] Just letting it be there over and over and over and over and over again. Yeah. Yes.

[00:09:21] So many people, so many people come to me like, Oh yeah, but I’ve tried that. Like, okay, yes, maybe you have tried that, but have you truly 100 percent radically sat down and let it be there and being in it without being in your head or being with the sensation without trying to get rid of it? Or have you nourished the sensation?

[00:09:40] Have you, have you loved on that sensation? Have you loved on it so decadently that, that you just want to breathe it. In yes. And I actually mean your fear. I mean, your fear, be with your fear so decadently and breathe it in so much that it never wants to go away and you will see that it dissipates and it’s okay if it doesn’t as well.[00:10:00]

[00:10:00] And so we, and like, what is your relationship with your desire as well? Do you, how often do you let yourself just be with your desire and how can you be with your fear and be with your desire and see all of these goals as something that the sensation of being where you are right now. In relation to your desires, you can do it.

[00:10:25] And we do this, teach my clients in my program, buddy based business to do this by using resourcing. So making yourself feel empowered, making yourself feel like this, a beautiful container of a client. She calls it, she says, I’m a coffee cup because we talk about how she, she is the coffee cup and she can hold all of the different sensations of life.

[00:10:46] And, and she, she’s strong enough to do that. So we want to resource into that feeling of I’m strong and I’ve got this and I’m powerful and I can do this. And also we want to tend to your mind so that it can focus on the [00:11:00] sensation and the. experience of it. There’s a softening in my belly. There’s an opening in my jaw.

[00:11:05] There’s a tension in my pelvic floor without going into the mind of thinking about it too much and analyzing it and listen to another podcast on it. We want to be with it. And when you can really hold that whole experience in the body without getting out into the mind, without criticizing yourself, without going into shiny.

[00:11:26] without people pleasing or trying to make your business something that you thought that it needed to be, but it doesn’t, you don’t really want it to be or without going into hopelessness or shame, then you’re going to actually begin to notice that you can be with your desires without feeling pressure, without feeling urgency, and with enough imagination and capacity and curiosity to To access the intuition or the intelligence that you need to reach those desires in a way that feels organic and [00:12:00] feels fun and feels easeful.

[00:12:04] So that’s going to be your practice is. Being so deeply with that desire and you’re going to get dysregulated sometimes and that’s okay. Be with the dysregulation and you’re going to have to practice this. This is not something that I expect you to get right 100 percent now because you listened to a 10 minute podcast.

[00:12:21] This is something I’m going to invite you to be in practice with and you are in practice when you work with me. When you make the decision to begin to work with me. And you’re also in practice when you connect to this podcast, when you connect to this in community, this is a space to practice being an embodied entrepreneur, this is a movement, this is a community that you are a part of.

[00:12:45] So saying that I’m going to invite you to share this with one of your friends. Invite them into the practice of embodied entrepreneurship. And I’m going to recommend that if you have not listened to episodes 39 through 43, how your nervous system affects your [00:13:00] business, I want you to go back and listen to them.

[00:13:01] And if you have listened to them, but you haven’t listened to them in a few months, go back and listen. It’s very helpful to notice and pick things up and practice. Receiving information at different levels. You’ll begin to notice different things as you move along this path. This specific, , episode series is where I share what separates you from those who seem to have like cracked some code in business.

[00:13:22] I. Share with you the information that I found in kind of a moment of divine desperation where I was having feeling quite frustrated and burnt out in my business. And I started applying trauma therapy training and my nervous system awareness to the things that I’ve been doing. And it is the knowledge from these four episodes and the knowledge from this whole podcast, but really these foundational space, these four episodes that has helped me and my clients create sustainable income, build this somatic business plan, a roadmap and a structure to increase income and increase.

[00:13:53] Ease and spend a lot of time napping, laying in the sun and perfecting our [00:14:00] tacos. Tacos not me thing, but I have a lot of clients who eat a lot of tacos. This episode or the episode series covers the foundations of the four places your nervous system influences your business income and impact, what polyvagal theory is, and this is important, what everyone is missing about it and how to start leveraging your nervous system for success today.

[00:14:19] You will find the link to the first episode. Below in the show notes. Thank you for listening.